Shining a Light on Solitary Confinement: Surviving Solitary

Shining a Light on Solitary Confinement: Surviving Solitary



I mean obviously its bearer and it's cemented metal I mean you know extremely unpleasant it's bars so it's there's no privacy here and that's uncomfortable for the first saw you I walked into I was afraid to sit down it was just that nasty you know I spent a whole day just clean to myself I scrubbing it from top to bottom so yeah it was kind of a hard transition at first now you have to eat on is spring is like ice in the sales right time think about the solitary confinement is we really don't have too much contact with other people that really affects affects us because the only time you have human contact is when we're getting the handcuffed and come out you take a shower or go inside that tiny red cage hit when I first got here I had she'll come up to me i had only be in here for three days i was in the hole and he said I just want to say right now we don't give crap about you so just shut up sit there until you're out of the hole and I was like wow what a welcome it pitted on what seals were now you got some skills at school age time do they AR s and go on they got some yoga just go we got a job description maintain or well at first I was just angry you know first three weeks I was just currently pissed off it's like I don't bother you mana and I'm quiet and I do what I'm told you still give me a hard time a lot of them dislike it's just because her prisoner or something like well that's why I'm in prison I'm paying my debt to society by doing the amount of time i was given I just try to keep my mouth shut and they say something I don't care to hear I just I don't say anything anymore because it's not worth the trouble you get into you when you open your mouth there's no waited to stand up for yourself period I internalize things so I'll go lay down and I'll just cry I don't know what else do they can go Mase they use it really a disperse large fries right this is what they spray inside sale they hold position they stick that in there in a unloaded inside that small cell oh my god and it chill top everyone in a blog go it shows up the entire floor even the officers have to walk around the respirators on cuz they can't green and nobody cares no it's like an animal they don't think you deserve your own family your friends you know observe bail serve proper portions on your tray don't deserve none only deserve is what we come in here and take out one that's what Judaism we're gonna I listen to the tone you watch the judges discretion can't see me as another human being on a number of tasks so when we put our fingers of our window we want you in over here we want you to see that someone does here in a later time you can forget about going a wreck because you know it's it's just too cold so what the hour you would get to go do that is is kind of non-existent it's just I was kind of amazed because you know I knew that you were supposed to get that our out of rec and it never happened they get left out a lot of stuff wreck the the menu for for your meals is you know it's like all peanut butter there's no eggs not the gnome units just I think a lot of that stuff's on ferry guys are screaming back and forth at each other and it's I had to make my own ear plugs just like a sleep at night so for the most part I just I listen to music in to read books that's how i passed my time if it wasn't for books i probably would have went off deep in sending yourselves hold on your thumbs like metal wall you know ball back north china so sometimes work out no net that's all came and decision but a full all a date and not being being happy you don't fall what I need to not being able to touch my fam oh my friend when I ain't coming soon if your extrovert yeah they could be really difficult so and there's some guys just don't function well at all on the outside I had a therapist and I had you know the psychiatrist the one who gave me the medications both of them are attentive and listen to what I had to say it's hard to get through something in here because you don't have the therapy time you just get the medications I wasn't as depressed as I am now I I'll have I didn't have as much animosity then I do now towards people I I didn't feel like everybody was out to get me and since I don't have any human contact with anybody I Ohio and react when when I do get around people because I haven't been given the process to actually interact with people solitary confinement is not for human beings it breaks the person in so many ways and if you give up hope and you have nothing in this place does that to you you

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