Well-Being Week Special: Connect. The Well-Beginners [Episode 1]

Well-Being Week Special: Connect. The Well-Beginners [Episode 1]



welcome to the world beginners this week is well-being week and therefore every day this week I'm going to bring you a new video focusing on the clangers element of well-being and today is Monday so I'm going to be focusing on connect I know it sounds silly I'm going to go around trying to connect with people for the sake of the world beginners but I think it's something that's really overlooked and can lead us spinning a lot lonelier than we expect so it's really good to connect with different people as well as catch up with their old friends and not making new friends second honey what are your friendships like it's go so now but it was very hard to make friends because obviously I moved up from another school and you get into your class what do I do now so first couple I was just kind of alone just going to my friends that were from my office but they weren't in the same class as me so when it came to stuffing plants is kind of same when we're in adults we know and we don't try and fried chip and make new friends if we want to go and do something we trying to on people we already know and if we're out somewhere we don't try and talk to other people and try meet new people we we stick with what we know and I suppose it's a survival mechanism that's quite dangerous because when you sort of lose friends to make new ones it makes it a whole lot more challenging and what I found is taking that risk and that first step meet new people it's my favorite thing but it always pays off really when you face movie yeah and what was it like yeah well so you've been top of your school in primary school yes six and then you move to secondary school where you're at the bottom again so basically you feel like you're not really well not really there was this old teacher from my old high school she didn't really take and all my other friends from primary they went off into other groups and just you have friends do you talk to everybody in your classes at school well mainly no because basically half of the class they just don't want to know me in half be like oh yeah we'll work with you and then you get the okay do you know do you know I just feel like that's what they do do you think I have spoken to them before but they yeah right it's like I I will go into groups and stuff and like sometimes they don't like me be Who I am but they like my parents and working but they like my best friends although going my best friend and then you just kind of like walk away and go right I know that I'm not like she wants me I think there's a real issue with friendship through what happens you you're getting a group of friends with somebody but then you can't make new friends with other people because you feel if you go from one group of friends when you go make friends with new people you feel like you're betraying them and they were like oh I so they don't like this anymore they don't like us have got a new friend and I think that's secondly that happens in primary school I had a friendship group quite free to go and talk to a range of people and I like that I don't I've got all my friends and close friends but I don't see them all the time I just check in with people occasionally but I think that's work a lot a lot well for me just talking to people occasionally and messaging them how are you doing problem that ladies it's when I want to go out to a concert or a show and do something I want I want something to go with I've got that group of friends I can ask them if not I don't have anyone to ask it's been going on my own you see cuz I think if he mix around lots of different people you won't have one close friend as such but if you have one close but you can rely on them as soon as you have an well I mean it's better to have boats actually because you can have them close friends you can go to when it's your best friend that goes I had an argument with you oh yeah starts going off with other people and starts leaving you out so you can go to those and like tell me that brain can be like okay is it okay if I hang out with you and then you can get closer so you're learning more things about them but also not being in drama and arguments with the other best friend yeah thank you very much trying to poach them and go and you just have to go hi my name is say your name and maybe you're getting to a conversation or something YouTube both right hey guys my name is Ivan and today I'm here to talk to you guys about how to maintain friendships and how difficult it is to also create friendships now I do struggle with maintaining friendships do some I learning difficult is my condition that I live with also which is called neurofibromatosis if you want to search it up you can you don't have to buy anyway back to what I'm saying I do find it difficult to maintain friendships because I'm either too clingy or I'm trust people to be much basically so when I put too much trust into people they know excuse me how to controllers and I've had people who I've trusted so much so much so like it's a relationship level excuse me and they've been able to control it and then I've been stuck in a toxic friendship and I actually lost way to that off and you asked about freestone in two months and I just knew I had to go person I managed to cope with a lot button up my life and then I started to build myself up and make myself more confident again and I didn't show my true self to people for a while or trust people easily for a while cuz I found it too difficult just again after what that person money should do how they might used to how they managed to control my mind or manipulate my mind in some sort or way anyway I also find friendships difficult because some people just judge me by my music taste if I'm listenin to god I'll assume I'm gay and it's like I thought you were gonna be you know a good friend I could have thought oh they're gonna be a nice friend but they're 40 judge me do to me Roman agog Artesia or listening to Lady gaga and it's you know like why why are you judging me just cuz I'm a music miss all my clothing Trust is one of the main things in a friendship and when you know friendship I'd say don't show your true self for a while and I sound stupid if you show your true self you've got to come across too strong Dona Fausta right word or a bit too forceful which I have done in the past and then I am no longer in those friendships so Trust is one of the main things confident you have confidence to maintain the friendships and build friendships I'd say love as well love is a big one because you also need to look II sell to love other people friendships are one of the most friendships are one of the most powerful things on it you know you need friends day to their lives then they can help your confidence or you know you can do they sell but I'd say you do need people around here that can advise you that can help you you know become bad not be you just be careful who you want to be friends with because demand manipulate you they could do anything oh having friendship with people that you trust and love is one of the best friends in the world I'm gonna wrap it up bye guys and I hope you've enjoyed listen to me waffle wall about friendships and advice about friendships anyway guys I shall see you I hope you guys have an amazing evening they hope you guys have an amazing day I've really enjoyed talking to people about connecting today I've had lots of different conversations with lots of different people and I think that's the best way we can help is by having conversations some of them are difficult conversations but the only way to make change is by having difficult conversations and when it comes to mental health and well-being I really think that's the way forward and I know when I was talking to Holly and Lily they were talking to each other about friendships and things that never spoken to each other about before and hearing from them really sort of made me find some middle ground that our friendships were just the same and talking to Erin I know when I struggle to make friends it's sort of the same thought process so when it comes to connecting with others we're all in the same boat and I think what really helps if the talked people about it but tomorrow we're moving on to learning and it's Tuesday so the plans are I've got a driving lesson so I'm learning something and I'm sure I'm gonna come up with some other way get some learning done tomorrow and really explain what the benefits are of learning so I'll see you then thank you very much for watching you can listen to the well beginners podcast over on the well beginner's website and you'll find all available links somewhere just look very much

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